See you at the intersection of Terrible Wrong and Awfully Right, which is where they make this beauty.
Taco Bell Introduces New Culinary Abomination To Troll The Internet With: A Burrito Filled With Nachos
WHAT. Time to make another trip to Taco Bell.
AUDIENCE ASSEMBLE! Check out our fancy lil’ show logo for THINGS ‘N STUFF tonight. Dang, that’s some shit-hot work by the great Corey Pandolph (fakerockstar.tumblr.com). Corey is a cartoonish for THE NEW YORKER among many other accomplishments. And a righteous dude. And has now given me and my inner-fanboy our very own Avengers movie-styled logo thingy. Suffice it to say the supergeek in me is doing cartwheels and eating Little Debbie cakes right now. Can’t wait for this show.
Follow Corey on twitter at @fake_rockstar
If you insist…
Cue the houseband, captain, for the premiere of THINGS ‘N STUFF is nigh! And I love that word. Nigh. Nobody ever uses it more, really. It’s a losty & forgotteny (my version of “oldie but a goodie”). But it’s so much fun just to say it before anything is oncoming or at hand. Try it some time. Like perhaps when you stand up to get a beer at a baseball game, shout out in a terrible Victorian England type of accent, “Commoners, my trip to the refreshment pavilion is nigh. PREPARE YOURSELVES!” You’ll be the hit of the bleachers. Anyway…
Tangents like that and more tonight at the premiere of my new monthly comedy-variety show, THINGS ‘N STUFF. We’ve got College Humor’s STREETER SEIDELL, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon’s SETH HERZOG, Moth champion storyteller ADAM WADE, and author & The Daily Show co-creator LIZZ WINSTEAD on the show. And by now you’ve watched the video of our houseband, RENEGADE ACCORDION, and thought to yourself, “The time for me to come see this new Nick Stevens-led humor program featuring movie themes and pop tunes on accordion is nigh!” See what I did there.
Things ‘n Stuff - 9pm - The Ace Hotel (20 W 29th) - $8 - be there!
After many a moon I finally have a new live comedy show in NYC. And I couldn’t be more excited about it. I am fat kid with a $20 in his hand at the ice cream truck on the beach in July excited about it. And if you’ve been a fat kid (ding!), and heard the bell of the ice cream truck ring (ding!) by the beaches of Cape Cod (ding!), and your parents gave you a $20 (ding!), and told you “Go get what you want, and bring me back a bomb pop.” (ding!), then you know what kinda excitement I’m talking about.
Next Monday, May 7th, I will be offering you “Things ‘n Stuff”. Yes, a monthly show chock full of, well, all the things ‘n stuff I like. I love comedy in all formats. I love talk shows. I love game shows. I love making and watching funny videos. I love doing voiceovers and radio plays. Love me some banter and nonsense pertaining to movies, sports, culture, food and all things inappropriate. Well, I’m gonna give them a home. This here little show will be all of that, “and then some” (free drink to the person who tells me at the show what 80’s classic I’m referring to when I put “and then some” in quotation marks). I love all those kinds of shows, and in one neat seventy-five minute package I plan on bringing you a bit of them all each month.
Joining me for the maiden voyage of the USS Things ‘n Stuff will be some of my favorite performers I’ve worked with and enjoyed from a distance in recent year. Featuring…
**A regular at my old comedy-variety show, “The Shark Show”, now Mr. Downtown Comedy in NYC with his show “Sweet”. You’ve seen him in many an episode of “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon”, and I couldn’t launch a new show without him…SETH HERZOG
**This guy has been tearing it up all over College Humor for years, and co-hosts the awesome show “Pranked” on MTV2. STREETER SEIDELL
**Comedic storytelling has done exploded all over New York City, and for my money there’s nobody better than this 10x MOTH-winning maestro, the host of the always irreverent and undeniably honest “Adam Wade From New Hampshire’ show, my pal ADAM WADE
**And each month we will have a “Person of Interest” (not Jim Caveizel…yet), somebody who’s done a whole lotta things ‘n stuff we’ve enjoyed, and now they’re nice enough to join us for a chat and some laughs. This month we welcome the celebrated comedian, writer, activist and co-creator of this little program you might have heard of…”The Daily Show”? Her new book, “Lizz Free or Die” hits shelves and e-readers next week. LIZZ WINSTEAD
All these things and stuff, plus new videos, games and more, next Monday, live from Liberty Hall, at The Ace Hotel, a swankatorium to put on a show in NYC if ever. Good times ahoy, hope to see you there!
That’s right; the world’s most mechanically declined human being is hosting a show about cars. Well, not just cars. People who are not good at using cars. We call them bad drivers, I believe. And as I am coming to learn the world is full of them. So, where should bad drivers go? Beside the passenger seat, mass transit or a bicycle? They should go to “Driver Rehab”. Where world-class driving instructors attempt to break bad drivers of their hideous habits, and I tag along for the ride, supplying the quips, commentary and verbal navigation. The show is on the Car and Driver YouTube channel, part of YouTube’s new TV initiative. I understand that’s a lot of hyperlinks to click on, read about and process. It’s a Monday. You’re just looking for a video featuring a frog hilariously sitting on a bench as if he were a ponchy man. I understand. WELL, what it boils down to is…as TV and internet merge (interV?), Google is creating TV-like channels on the internet. So you can go and watch more original, niche programming from favorite celebs, media outlets, websites….whomever, whatever. And Car and Driver, the auto magazine, has one of YouTube’s 100 channels. And “Driver Rehab” is one of the shows. And I’m hosting it. And THAT is what makes time travel possible. Got it? Good.
So, when you get a chance subscribe to Car and Driver’s channel. Watch some shows, that seem like they were made for TV, even though they’re on the internet. But you might have Apple TV or a browser on your TV. Which means you’d turn on this channel and then watch internet programs on your TV, which would make them TV shows, really. Right? All I know is the people on our show stink at driving, and we have fun watching them try to get better. The real reason why I took this job wasn’t the money, or to host another program. No, it’s that I hope one day we’ll get my dad on the show. He is the worst driver ever. And if you’ve ever been in the car with him you know I’m not exaggerating, or just looking for a personal anecdote to end this blog entry on. He used to drive us home from Cape Cod while eating an ice cream cone, the newspaper splayed across the steering wheel, the Red Sox game on the radio, a smoke dangling from his lips. The very definition of a distracted, dangerous driver. And he’s only gone down hill from there. So this is kinda like a public service initiative from me. Please, it’s the least I could do.
Subscribe. Watch. Comment. Enjoy. Take in some of their opther shows (particularly my buddy Matty Blake’s show “Battle of the Beaters”). Oh, and make sure you look both ways when turning, keep an even foot on the accelerator and don’t be texting while driving. Unless it’s about our show…then it’s OK.
Part 2 of my “2 Videos, 1 NFL Draft” series…this is always my favorite video to make every year in my full-blown Masshole “character”, Fitzy. And it’s character that gets the quotation marks as Fitzy and I have sort of merged over the years. The lines have blurred, and not it’s truly a Dr. Stevens / Mr. Fitzy world I inhabit. I’m Joe the Narrator, Fitzy a Boston sports-obsessed Tyler Durden. Just watch the 2 draft videos and you’ll see the similarities, and the minimal difference. Anyway, great characters galore at this year’s draft, as always. Personally my favorite was the Steelers fan who did the spot-on Joe Pesci. With runner-up going to the Cool Ranch Doritos super-villain, and the Eagles fan who was there to reparazemp. You’ll see why these fanimals, and not just the chance to stand on line all day, or just talk football for afew days, then wait 4 months for them to play games that count, is why my brother and I go every year and do what we do.
Well, that and Geoffman and I are die-hahd supah-obsessed Tom Brady apologizing Pats fans who will nevah evah get enough. GO PATS!!! And please enjoy.
For the past six years (2012 included) I’ve made way to interview and engage the “fanimals” outside of Radio City Music Hall, in line waiting to gain admission to watch the NFl Draft. I attend as my Boston sports alter-ego, Fitzy (here’s a prime example of which I type). I entertain the insults and endure the verbal bombardment sent my way by fans both envious and of enmity. What should I expect? I dress head to toe as a Patriots superfan, in New York. It’s total chaos, and always a good time with unshowered grown men in the jerseys of other grown men who play games for money. This year was no exception…plus I gotta to double-dip at the Draft store, being asked to make a fan-on-the-street video for CBS Local Sports, too. Thus there was a BOGO at the “talk to half-drunken football fans starved for football, attention and a restroom” store this late April. Fitzy video coming soon. Until then do please enjoy this…and no, football can’t come soon enough.
The tire through the rear window is my favorite touch. It’s the “rug that ties the room together”. Really…I am amazed at how someone was able to park this car down the street from me, and can’t help but wonder how he/she is going to move it when alternate side parking takes effect next Tuesday. Ah…only in Brooklyn.
![Remember when we said the hot dog-stuffed crust pizza from Pizza Hut was the reason we were all going to die, be it at our own hands or from well-deserved icebergs or alien superlazers? Well, I do believe I spoketh a bit too soon…It really is like Pizza Hut had a not-so-clandestine encounter with Taco Bell at a White Castle. Sliders-crusted? Brilliant / Horrifying!Winners here? Your mouth. Commerce. Illogical food fusion. Diabetes medication manufacturers.Losers? Your stomach. Your gal bladder. Your toilet. Burgerkind. The environment. The atmosphere. Animal products. Science. Logic.BTW - “Cheese Burger Pizza Event” = amazing high schol emo garage band or fantasy football team name. Same with “Crown Crust Carnival”.thedailywhat:
Fast Food Fusion of the Day: Some Middle Eastern Pizza Hut locations are now serving “Crown Crust” pizzas with a regal ring of cheeseburgers or chicken tenders cooked right into the crust. It’s two great tastes that devastate your digestive system great together!
It looks like the combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell was just the first step down a slippery slope toward the eventual fast food singularity.
[geekologie.]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m30jsuHzfq1qzpwi0o1_500.jpg)
Winners here? Your mouth. Commerce. Illogical food fusion. Diabetes medication manufacturers.
Losers? Your stomach. Your gal bladder. Your toilet. Burgerkind. The environment. The atmosphere. Animal products. Science. Logic.
BTW - “Cheese Burger Pizza Event” = amazing high schol emo garage band or fantasy football team name. Same with “Crown Crust Carnival”.
Fast Food Fusion of the Day: Some Middle Eastern Pizza Hut locations are now serving “Crown Crust” pizzas with a regal ring of cheeseburgers or chicken tenders cooked right into the crust. It’s two great tastes that devastate your digestive system great together!
It looks like the combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell was just the first step down a slippery slope toward the eventual fast food singularity.
[geekologie.]
I like to call this picture “WHY TWITTER CAN BE AWESOME” - finally, two of my life’s loves, together, at last. @oldspice @depresseddarth
YES. You have no idea how happy these signs make me.
Signed,
The Common Effing Sense You Left At The Deli Counter Because You Were Too Busy Updating Your tumblr Page When You Were Getting Your Morning Coffee
Don’t Be A Fucking Asshole on the NYC Subway
I’d like to launch an awareness campaign aimed at rude New Yorkers, written in a style they’ll understand, so that one day, maybe, they won’t be quite so shitty.
I should note that most New Yorkers are completely wonderful, caring people. It’s just that some of us seem to enjoy the “New Yorkers are assholes” thing a bit too much.
Yes. Thank you. All of this.
Anywhere in the world, don’t be a Fucking Asshole.
Yep, definitely not applicable to just the NYC subway.
Don’t be an asshole: keep your fucking kids away from my swearing. (Also keep your kids out of range of my sweary posters that are against swearing I guess?)
Via The Awl
THIS WAS THE MOST FUN I’VE HAD TALKING INTO A MICROPHONE IN AGES. Allow me to explain why…
Matty Blake is about as funny, affable and hard working as an actor comes. He’s a great dude, who I have deep bromosexual feelings for given that he does almost the exact same things I do for a living, and yet it’s never a competition. He loves Tom Brady almost as much as I do…almost. He got his start in comedy AND he still loves radio. Best of all he’s a hard worker who’s not one of those guys who always seems like he’s “working it”. Case in point? Though he’s a comedian by nature, he respects the craft of acting and the creativity that goes into trying to entertain, amuse and inform people for a living. So much so that he started a podcast called “The Actor’s Grind”. And recently he asked me to join him for an episode. Now I know what you might be thinking. “Oh good, cuz the world needed another podcast with white guys who think they’re so funny jerking off into a mic!”, or “Finally, another chance to listen actors and other soft-shoe tulip-pants cry about how tough their life is and that mommy and daddy didn’t love them enough so that’s why they ask if I want fries or salad.” If that’s what you’re thinking I applaud your stereotypical “fictional character from the mind of Nick Stevens” narrow-mindedness. No, Matty’s podcast is an insightful and irreverent look into the lives of the actors and entertainers today that you know but you just dont know. The people that act in or voice the commercials you see, host the cable shows you watch, write the sitcoms you DVR…all that stuff. That’s what we do. And we love doing it. And Matty has created an easy-going forum to get to hear why we do what we do and how we came about it, without it being a smarmy “Inside The Actor’s Studio” on tape. It’s guys and gals who love acting and hosting and voicing and creating, who know no other life and have no choice but to do this because it’s what we do and who we are, having a chat with a regular guy who lives this life, too. Sure, it seems like a charmed life when we get lucky enough to be on TV, or star in a show. Or get paid to be on the radio. But it’s a hustle and a grind and a schlep and a hump to get there. And this is the best place in the world to talk about it. And Matty’s the best guy to host the show. And this is coming from a guy who auditions up against him regularly, and he didn’t pay me to say this (a coupla free beers go a long way in greasing my wheels though, as you probably know).
SO, before Matty and I go play “Lady & The Tramp” over a plate of spaghetti and meatballs or act out Ben Affleck’s solution to “Chasing Amy”, please give this a listen. Yes, I’m asking you to put Matty and me, and his awesome producer Kieran, in your ears for an hour. But I promise it’ll be fun. There are some really good stories, lots of nonsense, rambling, whimsy, advice and inappropriate jokes galore. And Matty’s the best at leading the You Parade without making you sound like Claus Von Indulgerson.
For a direct link or to download the podcast CLICK HERE. Or to visit the website, where you can catch previous episodes or subscribe to the show via iTunes, CLICK HERE.
I’m a firm believer in making your own work, creating your own opportunities. That’s the only way I’ve been able to get a career going and have some fun along the way. And that’s exactly what guys like Matty are doing with shows like this. Just working, helping folks have some fun with this life that one and many have said can eat you alive. So check it out - and try to support the arts - listen to podcasts - see more live theater - go see a band instead of pirating an album (you know who you are!) - have a beer and check out some comedy - and all that shit. And of course, as my character/alter ego Fitzy would say, “Don’t forget to go f**k yerself!”
About me
Hi, my name is Nick Stevens. And welcome, (you), to my weblog cabin, where a warm, cozy, punderful time can always be had. I created this as a showplace for the stuff I do as a Comedian/Host/Actor type who talks pop-culture, sports and snacks with great relish (underrated condiment!) It's also where I like to share thoughts, nonsense and stuff. Yeah, that's how I wanted to write that. But, visitor be warned: if you don't like rimshots, nachos, "Star Wars", fake mustaches or the New England Patriots then I suggest you leave now.
